ESPN’s Rick Reilly gave a great rundown of Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson’s new book, appropriately entitled Ocho Cinco. Anyone looking for a good laugh should give Reilly’s piece a quick read. It provides a wonderful look into the narcissistic world people of fame sometimes inhabit. Included among the many tongue-in-cheek reasons Reilly gives us for reading the book are:
His stirringly descriptive prose. For instance, the vivid passage in the second paragraph, in which he describes his “huge-ass house” in Florida and his seven “sweet-ass cars.” In fact, Mr. Ochocinco is able to use the word “ass” 32 times in the tome.
His seamless transitions. For instance, in a particularly tricky passage about what he’d be like if he had a show in Las Vegas (Mr. Ochocinco opines that he’d be bigger than “Penn & Teller and Céline Dion and Siegfried & Roy” combined), he writes, “Damn, I digress a lot.” And then we are whisked on our way.
His business acumen. Mr. Ochocinco plans to come out with Ocho Cinco cologne, sportswear, cigars (in a partnership with former Cuban president Fidel Castro), sunglasses, hats, clothing, shoes, cleats and condoms. He also reveals his plans to skip a post-football career in broadcasting (“too easy,” he asserts) and become an actor, a skill Mr. Ochocinco learned from watching Denzel Washington. “I should be in a Broadway show. I’m that good.”
Transcendent indeed!
